The pilot has landed. I am quite excited by this news and I am certain I am going to meet him now. We are planning to meet at one of the bars in Central London where he is staying. He is booked in to one of the fancy hotels for a break before he goes off to start his job at another airline. I sort of can't wait.
Things with Beau are perfectly fine, but there has still been no real talk of exclusivity. I don't feel comfortable bringing it up just yet, and maybe its partly because I'm not ready to pick him above the others for now, but I have a feeling he assumes it's just the two of us... Not the 3, 4, 5, 6 plus of us...
I mean he is fantastic and the sex is amazing. It's beyond mind blowing at times! It's just I've never been able to settle. I've never been comfortable in a twosome. Sometimes I think I may be polyamorous. I mean I suppose it's flattering for someone to want you exclusively, but I've never been desperate for exclusivity. Of course jealously is natural, but I think if you deal with it, maybe its a better way of living? Having a primary relationship with someone such as a marriage could be wonderful along with secondary loving relationships with others. But maybe I'm just greedy? Or haven't met the right guy yet? Who knows?!
Regardless I want to meet the pilot and I want to sleep with him. Our private shows have been a long game of foreplay and I am very attracted to him. I think our meeting could be explosive to say the least. As long as it is safe I see no harm and I'm a very good girl when it comes to sex.
... *ATTACK OF CONSCIENCE!* ...
Poor Beau. I need to have this conversation about exclusivity soon. I just can't help myself sometimes. It's not fair to him. I can be so selfish sometimes!
Still want my sexy pilot though... Goddamn it!
Be better than me people! Stay strong and wish me luck!